You may have heard the phrase, "We are all connected." When I first heard this, years ago, I immediately dismissed this idea. Even at a young age, I understood that I lived 10 miles north of our small hometown and didn't have a clue about most of the people who lived there. And, as small as our community was, we certainly weren't related to everyone, right? There was no way I was connected to them all.
I did, however, understand that when my dad walked a certain way, or the tone of my mom's voice changed, that there was something wrong. They could just walk into the room, and I knew instantly to keep my distance and my mouth shut, even if I didn't see them at all. This was true for my siblings or even my farm neighbors that I would see in town or driving by our place. Something "communicated" to me to be careful or to pay attention in some way.
As I grew up, and later on in my adolescent years, I struggled a lot with my emotions. In my young mind, I had created coping mechanisms to manage how I felt by becoming hyper-sensitive to everyone around me. I had figured out that if I could anticipate the mood of someone else, I could change my behavior to mitigate the intensity of their emotions. I had become a chameleon to my environment with ninja type skills allowing me to minimize the emotional energy they were putting out.
You may not realize this, but everyone has an energetic field or "bubble" around us that goes wherever you go. Our body is a very large mass of electrical connections with information racing around to every part of us. This starts from the moment a random sperm successfully connects with an egg, starting a process of metamorphosis to become a human.
All the negative emotions: anxiety, shame, guilt, fear, anger; all can lead to a stressed, distorted, clogged energy field. Even emotions that we try to get rid of don’t go away. If we don’t effectively release negative emotions such as shame or guilt, our attempt to push them away will actually push them deeper into our energy fields.
Science has even measured and tested this electrical field, which the spiritual community refers to as your aura. If you can imagine this bubble of energy surrounding us to have a similar functionality as whiskers on a cat's face. The whiskers enable a cat to walk in complete darkness and know their environment beyond what their eyes can see.
Like whiskers, your aura (or energy field) "brushes up" against other people's auras and communicates information back to your subconscious mind. Some part of you has learned to understand and translate that information into action. Stop, go, run, relax, turn and look, smile, you name it. It is giving you information and you can act on it or ignore it.
The problem with being able to "feel" these things about people when you are young, you don't always realize that the emotions you are feeling are not your own. But you do know that when you are around specific people you feel a certain way.
When these feelings are uncomfortable, sad, scary, or even causing you anxiety, you will likely think that it's you that is creating the feeling. This misunderstanding oftentimes leads you to think there is something wrong with you or you feel unsafe. Your innate survival reaction will kick in, making you feel anxious and needing to do something to move toward safety. Safety may be found in how you respond to the other person. It could be that you start telling jokes, or that you will make yourself "invisible" by being quiet and not making direct eye contact.
In my case for example, when I was around someone who was angry, that would cause a rush of anxiety and a feeling of agitation would consume me. Through experience I had determined that to help lower this feeling, I would be still, listen, and immediately do whatever that person said. I wanted them to calm down and I wanted them to like me so I would feel safe.
When this sort of exposure to another person's intense emotions continues over years, if not decades of time, there becomes an energetic bond created between the two people. This energetic bond becomes so attuned, oftentimes the one person can feel the other person even when they are not in the same room, or even the same city. You may have even heard of couples that have been married for 50 or 60 years, being able to go for hours not even talking but knowing what the other person needs.
In the case of trauma that one person has done to another, or other sorts of long term unhealthy relationships, this can also create a sort of energetic connection between people. If your environment is such that you are around several people that have negative energy, this can affect how you go about living your life. Even though you are not responsible for the feelings, you are becoming weighted down energetically by them.
There are ways to remove these energetic connections. In the practice of energy healers, it is oftentimes called "cord cutting". This is the practice where a healing practitioner will utilize a variety of tools to cut cords that connect you with everyone. Not to worry, you can choose to reconnect with whomever you choose.
I prefer to look at it as a "cord release" because the visual of cutting leads to me to feel that something would remain connected to me. When I release energy cords, I utilize focused meditation and the power of my own will and voice to speak the following mantra:
I call upon my own Will and Sacred power to release all cords I have created with others, and what others have created with me. I call upon the Universe to return these cords to their Higher Self and my cords to my Higher Self. I ask my energy field to be healed and become whole. So be it and so it is.
While speaking this mantra, I visualize cords being removed and the connection point to my body and energy field healing. I see these cords moving away from me and back to their origin. As you continue to repeat the mantra, you may even notice certain people in your life coming into your thoughts. Allow these connections to be released and send them away with love.
I remember the first time I had a cord release done by a practitioner. I didn't really know what to expect. I stood there as the practitioner moved around me repeating a mantra they had learned. I could feel my body sway a bit and I relaxed. When it was over, I thanked them and as I walked away, I felt weightless. It was almost like I was walking on clouds. I had no idea the amount of heavy energetic weight I had been carrying around.
Now, when I think about the phrase, "we are all connected", I can see it differently. I now understand that being connected means much more than a place on a family tree or having my picture included with all my other high school graduates. Being connected is quite literally at an energetic level to include not only the people around me, but also plants, animals and my environment.
Albert Einstein said, “Everything is Energy and that is all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you can not help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics.” This precept has huge impacts on a person's perception of relationships and their perspective on what they are capable of doing to make a change for the better.
If you choose to release your connections with others or groups that have a lower vibration or "negative energy", you will automatically change your own energy to a higher vibration. This promotes better mental health and allows you to move forward toward the life you want.
If you or someone you know needs help identifying and releasing old patterns of an unhealthy relationship, contact Know Thyself Healing & Therapy in Minnetonka, MN, at (952) 222-7936 or visit our website to schedule a consultation with one of our experienced therapists at https://www.knowthyselfpllc.com/team.
Citations:
The Quantum Field: The Secret Behind Quantum Health - By PRL Staff, October 13th 2022. https://prlabs.com/blog/energy-fields-quantum.html
What is Energy Psychology? Part II - By Julie Schmit, MA, LMFT https://wildtreewellness.com/what-is-energy-psychology-part-ii/
Why Do Cats Have Whiskers? - By Anne Dagner, DVM; Tammy Hunter, DVM; Lynn Buzhardt, DVM https://vcahospitals.com/know-your-pet/why-do-cats-have-whiskers